Original Posted By: Greg Yotz
This has nothing to due with planes or piets, but it showedup in my email at work. Hope you folks enjoy it.BillAt a recent computer expo (COMDEX), Bill Gates reportedlycompared thecomputer industry with the auto industry and stated, "If GMhad kept up withtechnology like the computer industry has, we would all bedrivingtwenty-five-dollar cars that got 1000 miles to thegallon." In response toBill's comments, General Motors issued a press releasestating:If GM had developed technology like Microsoft, we would allbe driving cars with the following characteristics:1. For no reason whatsoever your car would crash twice aday.2. Every time they repainted the lines on the road you wouldhave tobuy a new car.3. Occasionally your car would die on the freeway for noreason, andyou would just accept this, restart and drive on.4. Occasionally, executing a maneuver such as a left turn,would causeyour car to shut down and refuse to restart, in which caseyou would have to reinstall the engine.5. Only one person at a time could use the car, unless youbought"Car95" or "CarNT." But then you would have to buy moreseats.6. Macintosh would make a car that was powered by the sun,reliable,five times as fast, and twice as easy to drive, but wouldonly run on five percent of the roads.7. The oil, water temperature and alternator warning lightswould bereplaced by a single "general car default" warning light.8. New seats would force everyone to have the same sizebutt.9. The airbag system would say "Are you sure?" before goingoff.10. Occasionally for no reason whatsoever, your car wouldlock you outand refuse to let you in until you simultaneously lifted thedoor handle,turned the key, and grabbed hold of the radio antenna.11. GM would require all car buyers to also purchase adeluxe set ofRand McNally road maps (now a GM subsidiary), even thoughthey neither need them nor want them. Attempting to deletethis option would immediately cause the car's performance todiminish by 50% or more. Moreover, GM would become a targetfor investigation by the Justice Department.12. Every time GM introduced a new model car buyers wouldhave to learnhow to drive all over again because none of the controlswould operate inthe same manner as the old car.13. You'd press the "start" button to shut off the engine.________________________________________________________________________________
Pietenpol-List: lighter side
Pietenpol-List: Re: lighter side
Original Posted By: Greg Yotz
Thanks for the laugh.... Unfortunatly that is soooo close to the truthis hurts....Bill Talbert wrote:> This has nothing to due with planes or piets, but it showed> up in my email at work. Hope you folks enjoy it.>> Bill>> At a recent computer expo (COMDEX), Bill Gates reportedly> compared the> computer industry with the auto industry and stated, "If GM> had kept up with> technology like the computer industry has, we would all be> driving> twenty-five-dollar cars that got 1000 miles to the> gallon." In response to> Bill's comments, General Motors issued a press release> stating:> If GM had developed technology like Microsoft, we would all> be driving cars with the following characteristics:> 1. For no reason whatsoever your car would crash twice a> day.> 2. Every time they repainted the lines on the road you would> have to> buy a new car.> 3. Occasionally your car would die on the freeway for no> reason, and> you would just accept this, restart and drive on.> 4. Occasionally, executing a maneuver such as a left turn,> would cause> your car to shut down and refuse to restart, in which case> you would have to reinstall the engine.> 5. Only one person at a time could use the car, unless you> bought> "Car95" or "CarNT." But then you would have to buy more> seats.> 6. Macintosh would make a car that was powered by the sun,> reliable,> five times as fast, and twice as easy to drive, but would> only run on five percent of the roads.> 7. The oil, water temperature and alternator warning lights> would be> replaced by a single "general car default" warning light.> 8. New seats would force everyone to have the same size> butt.> 9. The airbag system would say "Are you sure?" before going> off.> 10. Occasionally for no reason whatsoever, your car would> lock you out> and refuse to let you in until you simultaneously lifted the> door handle,> turned the key, and grabbed hold of the radio antenna.> 11. GM would require all car buyers to also purchase a> deluxe set of> Rand McNally road maps (now a GM subsidiary), even though> they neither need them nor want them. Attempting to delete> this option would immediately cause the car's performance to> diminish by 50% or more. Moreover, GM would become a target> for investigation by the Justice Department.> 12. Every time GM introduced a new model car buyers would> have to learn> how to drive all over again because none of the controls> would operate in> the same manner as the old car.> 13. You'd press the "start" button to shut off the engine.________________________________________________________________________________
Thanks for the laugh.... Unfortunatly that is soooo close to the truthis hurts....Bill Talbert wrote:> This has nothing to due with planes or piets, but it showed> up in my email at work. Hope you folks enjoy it.>> Bill>> At a recent computer expo (COMDEX), Bill Gates reportedly> compared the> computer industry with the auto industry and stated, "If GM> had kept up with> technology like the computer industry has, we would all be> driving> twenty-five-dollar cars that got 1000 miles to the> gallon." In response to> Bill's comments, General Motors issued a press release> stating:> If GM had developed technology like Microsoft, we would all> be driving cars with the following characteristics:> 1. For no reason whatsoever your car would crash twice a> day.> 2. Every time they repainted the lines on the road you would> have to> buy a new car.> 3. Occasionally your car would die on the freeway for no> reason, and> you would just accept this, restart and drive on.> 4. Occasionally, executing a maneuver such as a left turn,> would cause> your car to shut down and refuse to restart, in which case> you would have to reinstall the engine.> 5. Only one person at a time could use the car, unless you> bought> "Car95" or "CarNT." But then you would have to buy more> seats.> 6. Macintosh would make a car that was powered by the sun,> reliable,> five times as fast, and twice as easy to drive, but would> only run on five percent of the roads.> 7. The oil, water temperature and alternator warning lights> would be> replaced by a single "general car default" warning light.> 8. New seats would force everyone to have the same size> butt.> 9. The airbag system would say "Are you sure?" before going> off.> 10. Occasionally for no reason whatsoever, your car would> lock you out> and refuse to let you in until you simultaneously lifted the> door handle,> turned the key, and grabbed hold of the radio antenna.> 11. GM would require all car buyers to also purchase a> deluxe set of> Rand McNally road maps (now a GM subsidiary), even though> they neither need them nor want them. Attempting to delete> this option would immediately cause the car's performance to> diminish by 50% or more. Moreover, GM would become a target> for investigation by the Justice Department.> 12. Every time GM introduced a new model car buyers would> have to learn> how to drive all over again because none of the controls> would operate in> the same manner as the old car.> 13. You'd press the "start" button to shut off the engine.________________________________________________________________________________
Pietenpol-List: RE: lighter side
Original Posted By:>> Bill Talbert[SMTP:wtalbert(at)flash.net]
Subject: Pietenpol-List: RE: lighter side>How true it is........ Thanks. I needed that. Hope your weekend was>great....>>> ----------
Subject: Pietenpol-List: RE: lighter side>How true it is........ Thanks. I needed that. Hope your weekend was>great....>>> ----------
Pietenpol-List: RE: lighter side
Original Posted By:> Bill Talbert[SMTP:wtalbert(at)flash.net]
how cute! glad you enjoyed the game. back to work. another chester exercise.> ----------
how cute! glad you enjoyed the game. back to work. another chester exercise.> ----------
Pietenpol-List: RE: lighter side
Original Posted By:> Bill Talbert[SMTP:wtalbert(at)flash.net]
How true it is........ Thanks. I needed that. Hope your weekend wasgreat....> ----------
How true it is........ Thanks. I needed that. Hope your weekend wasgreat....> ----------